Friday, January 13, 2012

My word of the year...

SO, there is something you should know about me... I am a little bit of a rebel [not too much to really get in trouble}.  When someone tells me to do something.  I want to do the complete opposite.  So when the idea of having a word of the year came around... I couldn't just pick ONE word... I had to be a little rebellious. 

My word of the year is:
Yep- 2 words!  :)  But it is one idea so I am going to count it and I hope you do too!  I have some ugly parts of me that I need to get rid of.  Here are a few ugly things I need to LET GO of this year:

I have a strong sense of fairness.  If something is not fair for me or my kids, I get angry and that anger turns to bitterness.  

Bitterness eats away at me and I cannot get past it.  

To help me let it go, I am going to say this verse when I start to feel the bitterness come on "Proverbs 10:12 Hatred stirs up conflict, but love covers over all wrongs."  Out-loud if possible.  There is power in God's word and I am going to use it!   

I am controlling.  Not in the clean-freak, organizing way (I wish I was more like that!), but in a "let me tell you what to do" sort of way.   I like to have things go my way.  I am a decisive person, and most times I am right {ok- all the time, I am right!} It can drive me crazy if someone does not do something the same way that I would have. 

Control...I want total control.  It is just not possible.  

I don't need to get worked up over other peoples decisions!  When I get the urge to control a situation I am going to say to myself  "I am not them, they are not me... I am not going to think about it" {there is going to be a lot of self talk this year!}

Judgment just piggy-backs off of my controlling nature.  It is so easy for me to jump to judgement when someone chooses a different path than me.  

I have always tried to keep this part of me in check, it is the main reason I am not on facebook {Jeannine runs our F&J facebook page}.  All those FB statuses to judge...Oh, I could be all kinds of ugly on Facebook.  {I am not against FB... it is just not right for me} 

Another step to help me out is to have this verse memorized: Luke 6:37 Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven.  I think the world would be a much better place if we forgave instead of judged. 

I have a creative mind.  It is great when I am working on crafts during the day... but it is a bit scary at night.  My mind races to all sorts of horrible things to worry about and fear.  I have some major anxiety at times.  To the point of paralyzing panic attacks. I worry about my kids, my husband, my life.  

I am letting go of caffeine this year. It is a trigger to my anxiety, so it is going bye-bye.  I have been off caffeine for about  a month and I don't miss it that much!  

I have to repeat outloud what I know about my God.  
My God is BIG
My God loves me
My God WILL take care of me and my family.
My God conquered death
My God is in Control (not me!)
My God is WITH ME- all the time
My God knows what is best.


So this year I am going to "Let go and Let God"!  
Yep- totally cheesy and cliche but I had to say it because it is true!

What is your word of the year?  Leave me a note or a link in my comments!

11 comments :

Kristin said...

AMEN!

Megan said...

I'm thinking you and I must be on similar wavelengths. At least when it comes to the control and judgement parts... I think it's because my 3 kids (my oldest is 4) are turning my world upside down and driving me to insanity some days. I'm grasping for control to try to compensate for the total lack of control I feel. Thanks for the inspiration.

Kim said...

All of us can do a lot of letting go, I'm sure! :-) Harder than it sounds, but definitely something to strive for.

Smallgood said...

I appreciate your honesty because I know I have some of those same things to work on. Thanks for the scripture.

Danielle said...

I can relate - I have let go of a lot these past couple of years and it feels great. I posted my word too - stop by and see.http://mostlyfoodandcrafts.blogspot.com/2012/01/one-word.html

Terri @ A Creative Princess said...

Oh my gosh, Fawnda, did you write this post for me? I have the same issues and ask God every night to help me. Thank you for letting me know I'm not alone.

Vanessa said...

Great word of encouragement and I will be praying for you.

Vanessa

Nancy's Couture said...

Wow! I love your honesty!!! I fit into a few of those categories myself....bitterness, being critical of others and myself. My word for the year is POTENTIAL. I want to strive to reach my God goven potential in my life. Spiritually, as a Mother and Wife, Emotionally, in my Thoughts, etc.
I'll be praying for you as you "Let Go"

JoTom said...

Wow! You put words to my exact thoughts and issues (except the caffine part, not giving up caffine!)! Good luck with the letting go. God speed...

Charlotte said...

Wow, that sounds like a post I should write. But I'm not going to decaf coffee.
Thanks for a great word or pair of words.

Ola said...

Wow, I can relate to most of your "Let go"s, thanks for the inspiration! However I can not let go caffeine or Facebook, I am too addicted! :)

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